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Same Journey, Different Road by Jill Krause

13 May 2010 4 Comments

What pregnancy the second time around has me thinking

Only 8 weeks into my second pregnancy and I’m already surprised at how different it is from my first. There are some similarities, of course, like food aversions and all day sickness that makes me feel like I might puke at any minute, but never do. The suspense just kills me. Will I or will I not toss my cookies today?

Different from my first pregnancy, though, I’m not nearly as tense, anxious and worried. I’m not as neurotic about what I’m eating or what time of day I take my prenatal vitamins. Of course, I’m also not spotting nearly every day, like I did the first time around (consistently weeks 5-9), so that really helps with the whole “not worrying” thing.

And I’m not sure if it’s because my body’s already been through this before, or if it’s because I’m spending my days chasing a high energy 2 year old instead of resting and relaxing, but I feel MUCH more pregnant this time around. I look more pregnant, I’m really, really tired, and I feel like all the symptoms are hitting me much earlier and harder.

All these differences so early make me think about all the differences to come, and honestly, it scares me. I had a pretty great pregnancy last time, and a fantastic birth experience. Those are 2 things I’d hate to see go any different, but I just worry I won’t be that lucky this time around. Now, I would be quite happy to end up with a better postpartum recovery and would be thrilled if Baby 2.0 didn’t come with colic, but I sort of want everything else to be the same… and I know it probably won’t be.

On top of all that, well, I think my first-born is absolutely perfect. Who doesn’t think that of their first-born? And thinking of a baby that’s completely different from him, I don’t know, it just scares me a bit. What if the next one is skinny and hates to eat? I don’t think I’ll know what to do with a baby that doesn’t LOVE all food. What if a white noise machine can’t soothe the next one? What if the next one hates to be swaddled? I guess I’ll just have to figure it all out like I did the last time, except with even less sleep than I had back then and a toddler marching to the Fresh Beat Band in the background.

There are exciting differences on the horizon, though. It’s fun to think of the next one looking completely different and wondering who he/she will favor. It’s fun to wonder what their temperament will be, what kind of sense of humor they will have. Those are the differences I’m trying to focus on, reminding myself that one way or the other, this experience, same or different, will be just as fabulous.

Jill Krause is a BornFree Panel member and blogger.


  • Leslie said:

    I’m going through the exact same thing right now. Kendall and my son are only a few days apart and I’m 10 weeks pregnant right now. I’m in the opposite boat. What if this one LOVES to eat?? That would be awesome.

    Oh, and my son loves the Fresh Beat Band so much that my parents bought him drums for his birthday and he has to play with the show. :)

  • Jaime said:

    You are so not alone! I am going through the same thing right now! I am about 17 weeks along (with an alomost 2 year old at home) and this pregnancy has been completely different. I was not sick a single day with my son, only gained about 15 pounds total, felt energetic, etc. I pretty much knew I would be in for it this time though since last time was a breeze and boy was I right! I have been sick since before I even found out I was pregnant, feel huge, gaining weight like crazy, exhausted… I am convinced this one is a girl LOL!

  • TheVintageChain said:

    My first and second pregnancies were very different too. Boy first, girl second if that helps. Less worried with the second pregnancy because I was too busy chasing a toddler. I had the morning sickness too that never resulted in puking, but that awful feeling was always there. That subsided after the first trimester though.

  • YESICA said:

    Every pregnancy they say is different from the last. I have a 4 year old girl and a 5 month old boy. My 1st pregnancy was good but a little scary because I would be short of breath a lot. My husband was always on edge. Especially because I ended fainting one time. Well the second time around I wanted to be even better. Luckily my short of breath problem didn’t occur this time. I gained about the same about and I continued to exercise throughout my whole pregnancy. I did have different craving though and I believe it’s because this time around it was a boy. With my daughter I craved sweets really bad. With my son I craved potato chips (which I hate) and tapatio!!! So I knew I was having a boy : ) I never thought I would be able to love another child as much as the first but you can. It’s amazing because it a whole new person with a different personality. My 1st will always be my 1st and nothing can change that. She is also a brat and that’s probably because she is spoiled and a girl. My boy is completely the opposite and super mellow. I am so grateful for that. Now I am excited to go through another pregnancy one day but not too soon. This time I want the sex to be a surprise. Good luck on your pregnancy and recovery.

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